Dear Kings and Queens,
There’s something I’d love to share with you. Something I learnt over the weekend.
See, you’re always going to meet someone and fall in love with them… probably at first or second sight (I don’t exactly believe in that, but let’s go with it). More often than not, the person won’t like or love you back…not immediately. That doesn’t mean you should fall out of love with the person, or that you’re unlucky, or that your love is not valid. It is simply what it is, the person is not you – he or she doesn’t fall in love immediately.
Now, remaining in love with the person won’t guarantee the person will love you right back, or later. For some people, love is not a feeling – it’s more of a conscious decision, to be with someone who brings out the best in both of you…and honestly, that is the best kind of love for me.
But that also means you need to give the person time and chance – as a matter of fact – you need to give everyone else that chance to make that conscious decision…their own type or definition of love is also valid.
It’s a risky move. Yes, it is risky. The person either realises you’re what he or she needs and falls in love with you, or he or she decides otherwise, or maybe he or she doesn’t even want to decide at all – maybe because he or she just prefers enjoying the moments – because they’re scared of what they stand to lose if they decide. Yes, it’s a risky move. I mean, love is all about having faith in the other person, putting yourself out there 100% and believing the other person got you. Love is always risky, and that is totally normal.
Now, to protect yourself, you should know at what point it becomes imperative that you stop wasting your time, especially if you have plans that don’t require you wasting that much time with nothing to show for it. Set a timeframe and follow the object of your love diligently until then. If they don’t return the love by then, you’re free to walk away.
Now here’s what I actually learnt over the weekend…
One day, you may be lucky to meet that one person who has the ability to change your life. That one person who looks like the perfect fit for you. That one person who completes you just as you complete him or her…the yin to your yang.
If you realize this first, and he or she doesn’t; if you think he or she is worth it, and that life may not make much meaning without him or her, then just focus on loving the person. Follow him or her slowly and diligently, at a pace that won’t cause him or her discomfort. Follow till it’s impossible not to follow again, when it’s certain you both cannot be together.
If that eventually happens, I need you to remember that you did not lose. It’s not something to cry or feel insecure about.
There’s no losing in love. Because love is a beautiful thing, and anyone who’s lucky to have it, even if it’s just for a little while, is a winner. When it’s time to move on, carry on with your life, be happy for the object of your love, and be thankful for the little memories you both shared.
Cos life is beautiful, and these memories – the little happy moments – are what makes life worth living.
And it doesn’t matter if you end up or don’t end up with the object of your love at any point in time. What matters is if you smile when you remember them or not. What matters is that feeling of satisfaction, knowing you gave it your best and your all, while it lasted.
I wish you the best, and I hope you get what you deserve.